The Power of the Mirror is only as Strong as the Person Reflected in it.

That line is from Grace Bowman's book THIN. I'm currently reading it (again). I have plenty of these type books. They are so versatile for me. Great when i was recovering, great for showing someone else had it worse, great for motivation (i know that is fucked up).

As from monday to this morning i have lost 1.1kg. Good start, but i'm still way too high. I used to be 45kgs!! I gained nearly 7kg in 12-15 months, that's disgusting!!!
Goal one is 49.0kg - award of a spray tan
Goal two is 47.0kg - award of a new book and/or movie
Goal three is 45.0kg - award to be decided then
My ultimate goal is 40.0kgs. Not too low, but totally not fat in any way. When i read the books about anorexia and/or bulimia they always say their goal weight kept on changing, they never got "there" and i worry that will happen to me. I've never reached 40kgs so i kinda hope that my goal will never change, once i get there i'll be happy enough to stop. I guess we can only find out.

I've been trying to find lots of little quotes/motivationals or whatever. Just little things that i can remember easily. Here are some of my favourites:

I'm not there yet, but i'm closer than i was yesterday

Only I can let myself fail

It wont be easy, but it will be worth it

What i see in the mirror hurts more than hunger ever will

Don't stop when you are tired,
Stop when you are DONE.

If you have nay, feel free to add them. I would love to hear your thoughts!

Think Thin,
Stay Strong

NoDisplayName!!

Failing

I have moved into my own place, but haven't had a good run lately. I had eaten 1000 cals just at work today, I was hungry when i got home and ended up binging. So freaking annoyed at myself!! And the worst part is its only day two of my new 1500 cal plan (start high, then reduce from there). I'm pretty pissed off right now. But tomorrow is a new day. I can do better tomorrow.

If you are out there and want to help me, compete with me, just have someone to email, please contact me!! I'd love to chat more with someone who actually understands what I'm going through!!

Think thin, stay strong!!